Taking Sides

When my partner and I separated a few months back, I expected some friends may take sides...not that sides needed to be taken. It was an amicable split and as far as separations go, surprisingly one of the least traumatic I've been through.

When my friends began asking about my [ex] partner...
"How's he doing? Is he ok? Would it be ok if I called him?"
part of me felt all warm inside that he was so loved, and part of me selfishly felt betrayed.

His friends did not call me. They did not ask how I was doing. They did not send me little emails checking in.

Was I not as loved? Were they glad he and I had parted ways? Did they put up with me simply because he loved me?

Not only did I mourn the loss of someone I had hoped would be in my life long-term, I also began mourning the loss of his friends.

I felt abandoned. I questioned their friendship. I was angry.

Surprisingly over time, the people I least expected to contact me, did.

I started to think about the neglect I felt. I was not loved any less. I was not abandoned. I was not disliked.

It was very simple...

What I came to realise was, friends were not taking sides. It all came down to the strength of the friendship.

When I really thought about it, there were friends I never completely bonded with.
They were 'his' friends.

So now instead of feeling betrayed and angry, I am thankful my world contains the friends it does.